Life Is Changing, Are You Changing With It?

  One of the valuable life lessons I discovered through 28 years of marriage and 25 years of parenting is that life is constantly changing and the people in your life are constantly changing. Do you fight these changes or do you accept and nurture them? Fighting change is the same as fighting growth. In our 28 years together I can say that I have been married to at least six different versions of my wife and I’m sure she feels the same way about her life with me. I am very fortunate to be part of her evolution as a woman and individual.

 

 Change Is Not Always Easy

  Change brings uncertainty and uncertainty strikes fear in many. Keep in mind, through all the changes you have moved though, no matter how difficult they were, you have made it out on the other side just fine. You were capable of handling change then ( give yourself credit ) and you are just as capable now.

  So take a deep breath and acknowledge that this is just a process of life and you now embrace it fully. You are ready to change with life and you will not allow yourself to be stuck in life.

Slawek Polinski

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We all encounter adversity in life and it is the way we respond to adversity that determines the quality of life we live. Will you choose to be a victim of your circumstance or will you be a victor and overcome the obstacles that life presents you?

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 Are You Willing To Change Your Life?

  I talk with many people that project a similar message which is:

 ”I am unhappy in my life right now, I need to change things.”

 When I discuss with them the things they are unhappy with and then give them suggestions for action steps they can take to change things around for themselves so they can begin to transform their lives, many times what I hear in response are excuses for why they can’t. The majority of the excuses I hear revolve around time, money or family and the real reason for these excuses is fear.

Why Would Anyone Fear Positive Change?

 The truth is most people are afraid of any change even if it is for the better. Their life might be miserable and at the same time it is familiar, they know what to expect everyday,… no surprises. A common example is the spouse who is in an abusive or unhealthy relationship and yet refuses to leave. They might be living a life of hell and it is a familiar hell and they know they have handled it in the past so they continue on in their familiar, painful life. A change might be better for them but what if…? The fear of the unknown always stops them.

You Have To Take That First Step To Change

  We have been conditioned from an early age that failure is bad and we get punished for failing. What happens as a result is we discover very early that if we avoid doing things we are unfamiliar with, we avoid failure and most importantly, we avoid punishment. It is better not to try than to be punished.

  This is a mindset that can be changed and it doesn’t have to be scary. First, you need to throw out the idea that failure is bad. As a matter of fact you shouldn’t even refer to it as failure, just feedback to achieve your desired results. Sometimes you have to figure out how not to do something in order to discover how to do it well. Second, it is important that you take even small steps daily to expand your comfort zone. The more you attempt the small challenges in your life or small opportunities to enhance your life, the more comfortable you will become in doing so. That uneasy feeling in your stomach will change from fear to excitement as you venture on your next adventure.

 Living the life you were meant to live starts with small steps and only you can take that first step. How bad do you want life of fulfillment?

Slawek Polinski

“Men of Action”

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Goal Setting Made Simple

   Do you find yourself falling short of your goals? Here is a story about three 12 year old boys and their determination and creativity in reaching their goal. As adults we often tend to make things more complicated then they have to be while children often can see the simple solutions to their challenges.

Slawek Polinski
Men Of Action

Your Life Is a Reflection of How You See It

  Have you ever been so certain on an issue in your life where you were convinced it was absolutely true, only to have a different point of view introduced that blew that belief right out of the water? Wouldn’t it be great if you can discover a way to dissolve inner conflicts as well as conflicts with others? How would you feel if you discovered a way to break through your fears and into your personal power to be able to achieve your goals and visions?

  This last weekend I was part of a powerful workshop/retreat with NLP master Terry Hickey where I learned some incredible tools to move my life forward as well as the lives of others around me. I highly recommend anyone who is looking for a huge transformation in their life to contact Terry.

 I believe in sharing personal information when I think it might benefit others and that is why I am including in this post my personal notes from Terry’s first day of his workshop. These notes are on how the information I learned will impact my life. This recording was taken while hiking in Tucson, AZ. and so at times I sound out of breath and there is some wind noise as well.

 Enjoy this audio recording and I welcome all comments.

Slawek Polinski
Men of Action

Don’t Take Life And The People In Your Life For Granted

    Saying “I Love You” means so much to the people in our lives and is never, ever said enough. Life is short, so never pass up an opportunity to let the people in your life know you love them. Take the time TODAY to tell them how much they mean to you. Live every day as if it was your last.Merry  Christmas to all!

Slawek Polinski
Men Of Action

 

Don’t Start Your Day on the Wrong Side of the Bed

   Start your New Year’s resolution today and enjoy a happier and healthier life. The way you begin your day has an impact on how the rest of your day will go, so start it off on a positive note.

What Are Your Money Issues? Part 1 Recap

  In “What Are Your Money Issues? Part 1″ I discussed how we as individuals relate to money and many of our money beliefs and money blocks were formed early in life. This is a common bond the majority of us share.

 In this installment of this article I will share with you my personal story and how it affected me in my relationship with money.

My Story and Money Issue Origins

  The easiest way for me to explain how our relationship with money is influenced by outside sources and circumstances is to give you an insight to my story, my background.

  I was born in Poland in the 1960′s and both my mom and dad  grew up on small farms near each other. They worked very long hours everyday to provide for their families and there was little time for leisure and recreation. They grew and raised everything they needed to survive on their farms and what was left over they sold to earn money for the things they needed. Money was scarce and there wasn’t much left over.

  Neither my mom nor dad made it past the sixth grade and when they were between the ages of 12-14, WWII was raging literally in their back yard. Their families were forced to live in root cellars while the German soldiers turned their homes into headquarters, while consuming everything their farms had to offer. Everything they had was taken away from them in an instant while they were living in fear. When the soldiers left everything they owned was gone or destroyed.

 Our Money Boat Sets Sail

  Let’s fast forward to 1965……

I arrive in the United States with my mom and dad, along with my older brother and two older sisters. Yes, this picture is actually of my family and no, we are not “off the boat.” Actually we were just waiting to get on!

  Many years would pass from that day we arrived and you would hear my dad tell the same story over and over, how he brought his family here with $3.00 to his name and how hard he had to work to make ends meet. Both my mom and dad worked very hard for their money here in the U.S.- working in sweatshops and factories and as we were growing up they made sure they reminded my siblings and me how hard they had to work to support us. As a young boy there was was much guilt associated with asking my mom and dad for money. I knew every time I asked I would hear the same routine over and over such as “money doesn’t grow on trees,” “do you know how hard I had to work for this?” “When are you going to start making some money?” Any of these sound familiar?

 This guilt was a part of my life for many years even after I moved out of my mom and dad’s home and started a family of my own. I remember vowing never to make my children feel any guilt over money and so I did the exact opposite of my mom and dad and gave them everything they wanted. I knew after awhile this might not have been the best approach either, and what surprised me even more was that my issue with money ran deeper than just rebellion against the guilt I felt about money as a child.

  The assessment I took gave me an insight about money I have never been able to see before and in the next and final part of this article I will discuss that and what it means to me.

Slawek Polinski

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How Do You Value Money?

  This is the first part of 3 articles on the subject of how people value money, their challenges with money and where these perceptions and challenges derived from. This is a lengthy article so I broke it down into three parts for easier reading.

  The topic of money is something everyone can relate to. It does not matter which country you call your home, in order to provide for yourself and your family you need some form of currency. There are some people who believe money is the root of all evil, while others look at money as the foundation for their dreams coming true. My belief is money is neither good nor evil, it’s just money and it is the people and their intention behind the money that determines whether it is for the good or evil.

  I was fortunate to have had the opportunity to attend a seminar recently and one of the topics of discussion was how different people relate to and value money in different ways. We all were given an assessment and the results gave us insights to how we relate to different areas of our life including money.

We All Share Something in Common With Money

  I was very intrigued and surprised when people began sharing the results of their assessment with the group and what the results meant to them. There was a common denominator in everyone’s story, including my own. The one thing that we all shared in this exercise was our money values and challenges were formed at a very early age. It mattered not whether the challenge was:

• Over spending
• Over saving or hording
• Not having clear money goals
• Not keeping track of finances
• Not making enough money
• Fear of losing money….along with many more challenges.

 The one thing that bound us together was the way our parents related to money and their finances had a significant impact on how we now value money today.

  As I continue with this article, I want to make clear this is not going to be one of those “poor me, my mom and dad screwed up my life” articles.  I believe as adults we are responsible for the decisions we make in life and being a parent myself, I also believe the majority of parents do the best they know how. That being said, very few will argue the point that the way parents view life and life’s circumstances will directly influence the views of their children as I know my views have influenced my son and daughter.

 In part 2 of “What Are Your Money Issues,” I will share my personal story and how it affected my relationship with money.

  If you would like more information on the assessment, how you can take it and what it can improve your life please contact me at slawek@menofaction.com.

Slawek Polinski

Men of Action

  5 Tips For Keeping a Sunny Smile This Winter

  As I look out the window and see the leaves falling with the cold rain, I realize winter is just around the corner and along with the cold air and snow come the long periods of darkness in our days. People will tend to spend more time indoors and spend less time outdoors doing physical activities. Whether you call it “cabin fever” or “seasonal affective disorder”(SAD…fitting right?) doesn’t matter, all I know is the feeling just sucks!

 So this year instead of waiting winter out and hoping that somehow this year will be different, how about taking some small action steps everyday to keep us smiling while the snow is falling. Here are a few simple things you can do that will keep you in a better frame of mind this winter.

 Limit Your Television Viewing

  One of the hardest things to do is keeping the television off  during the winter. The daylight hours are shorter during this time of year so the more time you spend watching TV during the day the less time you will in the sunshine. Schedule your viewing for the end of the day and limit the time you spend watching the news. Networks rely on ratings and what captivates every one’s attention is drama and fear so keep a cap on the crap you allow into your life.

  I challenge you  not to watch the news or reading the newspaper for one week! After one week see if you notice a difference in your attitude towards life. Don’t worry if the world ends tomorrow, you will eventually find out, without watching the news.

 Here is an interesting fact: If you watch 3.5 hours of TV a day and live the average life span of a man or woman, you would have spent about 13 years of your life watching that TV.

   When It’s Sunny, Get Outside

  The sun is very important in keeping our mood levels elevated so when you see the sun shining bundle up and get outside and take advantage of this FREE source of inspiration. This is especially important if you work indoors and see little of the daylight. Get outside on your lunch breaks.

  Keep Physically Active

  This takes commitment and is crucially important! If you can’t get outside to go for a walk or run or to a gym, get yourself started on an exercise routine in your home. Physical activity increases serotonin levels in us which elevates our mood.

  I have been challenged the last two winters with neck surgery in December of 2008 and shoulder surgery coming up next week. I found that any little bit is helpful, whether it’s walking on the treadmill, stretching or walking up and down the stairs in your home. Keep yourself active. How committed are you to feeling good?

 Watch Your Diet

  I know one of the easiest things to do when cooped up at home is keep opening up the fridge and cupboards looking for that comfort food. Be conscious of what you are eating and buy groceries that supply you with energy and not bloat you and cause you to feel sluggish which will bring your mood levels down.

  Listen To Uplifting Music

  Are there any songs that make you think of summer?  I have a collection of songs I like to play poolside in the summer so playing them in the winter connects me to the warm days floating in the water with a cold drink in my hand! Music is very powerful in that it links our emotions to specific times and feelings.

 Are You Starting To Feel Warmer?

  There you have it, just some simple suggestions to make this winter season a happier one,. The important thing is to be conscious of how your living and don’t just put your life on auto-pilot. Take action in your life, your happiness depends on it.

 I am leaving you with a song and artist that definitely brings out the memories of summer! Enjoy.

Slawek Polinski
Men of Action